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Courtesy of work’s Network News, morning political humor

by on Aug.20, 2004, under Humor

Politics as Usual

This tale comes from the first half of the 1900s:

One day in school, the teacher called three boys to the front of the class. Tom, she asked the first boy, Are you a Republican?

Yes, sir, the boy replied.

And Jim, youre a Prohibitionist,

Yes, sir.

And Sam, youre a Democrat.

Yes, sir, came the reply.

The teacher looked them over. Whichever one of you can give me the best reason why you belong to your party, Ill give you this woodchuck I caught on my way to school this morning.”

Tom jumped forward. Sir, Im a Republican, because the Republican Party saved the country, abolished slavery and has done everything good for this country.

Thats very good, the teacher remarked.

Then it was Jims turn. Im a Prohibitionist, he said, because rum is filling up the jails and the poorhouses. Its going to ruin this country, and if we had Prohibition everyone would be a lot better off.

Thats good, the teacher said.

Turning to the last boy, he said, Now Sam, tell me why youre a Democrat.

Well, sir, came the reply. Im a Democrat because I want the woodchuck.

adapted from A Treasury of American Anecdotes, edited by B.A. Botkin


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