Archive for December, 2005
I was thinking of something recently about how I look at life. It was after I was talking to Laura and dedicated think time that I decided to share what I came up with. I was thinking of how I look at life, and well, how I look at many things. It’s nothing I’ve ever really put into words, I don’t think, but is more of a fundamental viewpoint I have on life.
When it comes down to it, I’m a person who can be happy doing pretty much anything in any situation. I could be in a large group of people looking at how everyone interacts, at a party having a beer and listening to music, in a group of friends discussing politics to religion. I really don’t stress or worry about things – or when I do it’s rare and usually the result of things that… well, not out of my control but of being in a situation where I can’t affect the outcome of that situation. There are few, VERY few situations, where that’s the case. Yes, I can get sad and moody, or depressed, but when I do it’s my choice whether to be like that or not. Generally, I choose not to be.
I’ve mentioned before how I think life is about choices, and the choices you make. A person can choose whether to stress about things or whether not to do so. A person can choose many different things in life, but the biggest choice sometimes is just choosing to be happy. Not always happy, as there’ll be times where you’ll get angry, but choosing not to let the whims of fate really bother you, because you know you have the choice to do something about them. I choose not to stress because I know stress doesn’t help much. I choose not to plan many things because just going with the flow is sooo much fun. With that said, I do think about things, and try and make plans. But, I don’t let those plans overwhelm my feelings.
How I got to this point where I don’t stress is hard to explain as it is related to a choice I made a while back. I remember worrying constantly about what was going to happen in life, whether I was going to find someone to date, or any number of other issues. I think it was only 3 or 4 years ago, that I really stopped worrying and let go. You can kinda think of Office Space where the guy was hypnotized, but it’s more for me I just made a choice, and finally realized it with all my being – that being happy was what I wanted, and I chose to be happy. It was after this choice that things really changed in my life. I look back sometimes to what I was, how much I worried about things, and realize just how screwy I could be on things.
The summary could be said perhaps in once sentance: I choose to live a life where I’m happy, regardless of situation or difficulty, and that despite occasional difficulties, I know I’ll be ok, and I have faith in myself in overcoming ANY difficulty.
Been trying to figure out how to post this topic, but sometimes there’s no easy way to describe the feeling when you meet someone and you’re jaw drops and hits the floor. Or, when playing a game with that person, the jaw hits the floor again and again when you realize just how smart that person is in so many areas. Add to that that Laura is beautiful, responsible, VERY intelligent, and amazing in so many ways and you can understand why my jaw hit the floor SO, yes, I’m now dating a beautiful amazing woman named Laura. She’s definitely a very cool woman – who happens also to be into swords, RPG’s, video games, travel, thinking, and so many other things that I’m also into, that it’s hard to believe. Talk about one really rare and amazing woman
Course, part of me wonders what I’m doing dating a woman who called me a “smegging git.” Not to mention question the sanity of a woman who’d date a guy she called a “smegging git.” But, I also wonder and gasp in awe at the turn of events that led to us dating in the first place. Despite being awed at the turn of events, I have no complaints because despite being called a “smegging git” I’m now dating a really wonderful woman who amazes me every moment I spend with her.