Jason's Blog

Some personality notes

by on Jan.27, 2004, under General

It’s interesting, doing the whole self analysis type things. You try and figure things out, but no conclusions really come. I’ve been trying to figure out what I feel, where life is going, where life has been, all that fun stuff. In the end, I’ve found few definites, only things which make me search more. Of interest though, I’ve found one or two things which I’ve noticed about my personality.

  • First, it’s when I’m most tired/out of it/whatever that I’m typically the most honest.
  • Second, it’s also in that state when I can screw things up the most
  • Third, when I’m that tired, though I’m the most honest with other people or with myself, it’s also most when I want other people around, to talk, to pay attention to me.

Not all of this is a good thing, but it’s also part of me. Of course, this is a generalization, and not always true, but often it is the case. I also realize however, that some of this can change. I used to be MUCH worse about getting depressed or upset. Now, it’s more just the way life has been this last month or two.

As said, I still don’t have any definite answers, and am trying to figure it out. Some things of course, I won’t talk about on here in a public place, but those who know me, also can probably guess all that’s going on in my life, and understand what I’m talking about. It’s a personal struggle, and one I need to deal with myself. It’s just going to take some time.

A last note, I realize that in some ways I’ve changed greatly these last 6 and 1/2 years, the time since I started college (and finished), but in some ways I haven’t changed. I guess in the end, there are some ways a person never changes….


4 Comments for this entry

  • gina

    First, it’s when I’m most tired/out of it/whatever that I’m typically the most honest.

    Second, it’s also in that state when I can screw things up the most

    Third, when I’m that tired, though I’m the most honest with other people or with myself, it’s also most when I want other people around, to talk, to pay attention to me.

    I agree wholeheartedly with the first and second statements, regarding myself.  I wish I never got tired because of the truth in those two statements in fact.  (Heh…)

    Regarding the third statement, I seem to want people around most then but it is the worst time for people to be around me because I end up screwing up too much (going back to the second statement of course).  It’s a messy, messy thing, self-actualization.  {shrug}

  • gina

    No html?  Argh.

  • gina

    No line breaks either?  Bah. (Is this all C’s fault?)

  • jenny

    I imagine so, although I did contribute. sorry dude.

    we all have ruts in our life. I’ve hated my job for awhile now and kept saying I was going to do something and never did. then a great friend of mine here announced she was leaving and moving to Wisconsin to work. And that’s the kick in the ass I needed—I’m actively looking for a new job now.

    hang in there and use this time to wallow and be depressed and deal with it all. You’ll learn from it, you’ll grow and you’ll move on from the experiences. You at least are allowing yourself to feel, which is much better than shutting down in a state of denial.

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